Beyond My Control

I have landed on the Land of Smile, Thailand with an objective to earn my Master Degree in Leadership & Human Resource Management under the Thailand International Cooperation Agency scholarship that keeps me alive with little stuff that I can buy from my stipend of seven thousand Bahts monthly. The internet prepaid of four hundred bahts from seven thousand leaves me only six thousand six hundred in my pocket to complete the month long food expenses. My local travel expenses are to be met from this balance anyhow like visiting hospitals frequently and doing some shopping for kitchen items. Having to survive with that little amount is challenging and daunting task that I am fighting with. Wishful thinking of increasing our stipend is just like dreaming to build castle on sand bank.  It was beyond my control and no powerful mundane gods could come and throw some additional bahts to cushioned my pockets in my room. Dreams to visit beautiful places in Thailand is absolutely cut and broken due to thin pocket that I carry with me.  

Having to struggle with limited money in my pocket along with chronic hyper acidity in my stomach is further worsened by continuous sad and bad news of passing away of my In-law sister, nephew and In-law brother  in Bhutan recently. The information of their sad demise is fed to me very fast with the help of information technology like Wechat and Lines. Every moment of their approaching death is updated and the pain at my heart is unbearable one. Though I am far away from them, but the emotional pain is going through my heart and mind since I cannot meet them anyway. I am all alone suffering here in my room saying some prayers for their peaceful journey after death and to knock the door of Blissful Paradise of Guru Rinpoche and Chenrizi. The journey after death is like moving on the rough seas where the soul gets tortured endlessly before getting another rebirth in the form of human beings or animals depending on their merits collected during their stay on this earth as human beings. The power of merits will help the dead souls to gain any wishes that they make during the intermediate state of "Bardo". Therefore, doing some good deeds for their demise by the relatives is highly important as Buddhist concept of interdependence law of human life and death.

It was beyond my control, you all left me in sad and void mood alone here in the Land of Smile. I have no time to smile but feel always heavy at heart. How lucky to be born as my family members for very brief stay  on in this world as human being and bid me farewell suddenly leaving no traces of your faces and achievements in life. As said" Happy to meet but sad to depart", you all departed as destined to be. I know the fact that even if ten thousand Buddha cannot save us from schedule of "Death". It will snatch away our life forces and leave behind all crying family, friends and relatives for your passing away. You, demised souls can see me, but I cannot see you at all due to my limited realization or non-achievement of wisdom eye. Such are the facts of human life; birth, aging and death comes to everyone. It is just matter of who will go earlier and later but everyone has to pass this gate. Nonetheless, your passing away has alerted me to concentrate more on my meditation practices and you all are my teachers of impermanence and uncertain in life.  Let me pray that, we all will be reborn in the same family and continue to spread the Buddha Dharma and serve the sentient beings with sincere and dedicated hearts. May you all experience the visit of Dankinis for reception and attain the perfect peace.

Mindu Wangdi 

Professors & Paradigm

There is old Bhutanese saying that "the tree that bears heavy fruits will remain always bent down. And the tree without fruits will erect up its branches shapelessly". In the same way, so called the highly qualified Professors should be down to the earth with their fruits of learning for many decades as compared to non-qualified students at the College. But the modern education really could not make these Professors cool and down to earth with their doctoral degrees pasted on their name tag and many publications in the international journals with the recognition awards offered for their efforts and wisdom.

Listening in the class to different Professors' lectures on different subjects made me feel very sad and hopeless.  One Professor said in the class openly that in the future " Professors will be the most powerful people on this earth" Since they have power of  knowledge and learning updates for sale away to the existing knowledge hungry market. I, was just wandering, if Professors are powerful people on this earth, why this world was not ruled by the Professors than bad politicians on the top ranking list of organization structure. The knowledgeable people should be ruling this world and make better place to live with wisdom and power of knowledge. That did not happen in the past either and will never happen in the future too.

Such prediction could be just wishes made to the open and clear sky for rainfall immediately. This is how our learned people show off to their students who analyses their current mind set without sending any signals to their words and actions displayed. Such paradigm of our Professors could not be compared to the but tree without fruits that erects up with their bloating ego clashes. The modern business courses  flame up the ego of learners' rather than cooling down like tree full of fruits bending so low that others cannot recognize that he/she is a Professors or not from the crowd.

The  highly learned and realized master like Indian Saint namely, Shantideva, never spoke of his depth of knowledge and power of achievement to his students but always keep down to the earth and say "I don't know anything!" This saint finally dissolve his body into space and could hear his words only by the listeners while teaching his last chapter on Bodhicharyavatara. This is how our modern Professors should be displaying their true Nature of learned people to the society and benefit all from their wisdom and knowledge sharing. Does modern education really help to make human beings better cognitive animals? Or it is destroying the real essence of human values with bloating egotistic mind set for the sake of personal fame and recognition.

I feel that modern scientific & business courses bring more harm than benefits to the society in the form strategic business wars among the competitors leaving behind the human intrinsic values of  peaceful co-existence with the neighbors for the market share and profitability. If one could become billionaires listing their names in Forbes magazines; who bothers how many people go hungry everyday in the streets and villages and die every second without proper medical support from the state. That is the impact of modern education and wealth sharing programs coined as per the law of economics & strategic business management style. The paradigm of saintly learned person will always help every sentient beings in this hellish realm with his Bodhi Mind that have no ego clinging but purely selfless work dedicated  for the betterment of sentient beings spiritual  and economic well being showered with peace and tranquility in present and after-life too.

May the world be filled with such Professor cum saint like Shantideva who can dispel the darkness of all students with his power of wisdom and knowledge and show the path for after-life too. May the blind spot & short shortsightedness  of our existing Professors be shed off by the power of Shantideva, wisdom Buddha to help students be guided in a clear direction with purpose and meaning in life instead of hunting money and power with different games.

Mindu Wangdi

Cowboy 2

Who does not like the life with full of fun and freedom on this earth? who is really committed to their words and translation into action. We human being tends to say one thing in front of someone and do ugly thing behind the curtain. Long retreat at V.M Mansion with my chronic sickness for almost one and half being jailed in. It was right time for me to explore Bangkok city of night life. I heard only the story from my friends who frequents such place known as "Cowboy 2" to watch beautiful and sexy ladies showcase their body figure with slithering dances in front of us.

Anywhere I go, I do learn new thing known as soft skills that helps me to cope with life in better way. The taxi driver will guide us with many names of Pubs filled with girls and visitors. This is another lucrative niche  of business model practiced in Bangkok to earn better profit. The night life begins from 6 PM to 2 AM and visitors tends to depart after that long stay at pubs with wine and beer. The freedom of enjoyment is highly realized on the land of Smile. The girls can have their better choice in life to be at home or at bars to make their living. There is nothing to be shocked or ashamed of such way of earning their bread. It is an accepted facts.Some society's will frown at such bar life and say strictly "Not Acceptable". Jobs are limited and living  in the city is getting harder in any where on this world. Only few enjoy very comfortable life.

Most of the commoners go hungry everyday and many beggars are seen loitering in the street for coins. I was just wandering, how many coins will that beggar could collect per day. The small kids are slept on the foot paths with a cup nearby for donations from street roamer like me. I rarely could throw even a single coin in their cups since I am also just surviving hand to mouth. I know, I should contribute few coins to their plight but I am helpless. The guilt in my heart pricks for I have failed to serve my past parents suffering in this hellish life.

I know in my heart all of you who suffer as beggar, bar naked dancers and sex workers  to entertain their guests are my past beloved parents who cared and tendered me with food, clothing and love. But due to our ignorance and attachment, we are born in different forms in different countries and we cannot identify our relationships since we are changing everyday and dying every second. Today we meet at this bar as entertainer and guest, tomorrow we might be at cremation ground to be cremated away to get another bodily form. What value does our sexy and slithering body have achieved really if we cannot identify "who I am". Am I only mean for such jobs and die without understanding "self Nature" could be worse life than animals ever lived. Do we have time to ask self-exploring in depth question for self -discovery with busy schedule day and night? Even the highly learned person may not be in that position to quest and discover further as the world is moving fast and humans are rushing to catch up the trends. That is how our precious life is wasted and gone to the dustbin. It is tearful since we all are just licking an knife coated tiny honey risking our life.

What ever may be the job we do on this earth to earn life. It is fine and sounds charming if it makes you feel satisfied with. Life has to go on and living should be made anyway. But, very important part in our life; we should try to explore our inner self-journey rather than having excessive travel round the world blowing away the dollars for human flesh, drinks and tobacco for earning short lived happiness and freedom. Such freedom  and happiness are temporary for us. It vanishes away due to our aging and sickness. The perfect peace and happiness lies in knowing our self-truth or Nature. May the happiness of bar dancers, beggars and visitors be doubled. May you all enjoy continued peace and happiness by rocking your bodies on the steel wheels and earn lot of tips from blue eyed foreigners that you glued with expectations. They will blow off their dollars for you. Best of luck.

Mindu Wangdi

The War

The history is the crystal clear mirror that documents the thousands of wars fought for many generations by different nations for different reasons. Reading the history makes my heart bleed since many soldiers and citizens lost their lives for sake of war and battles. It could be the safeguarding of their national boundary on the land and airspace and pooling the natural resources for economic gain, the wars were waged against their enemies. The concept of war indeed is directly linked with any national leaders attachment for the power, economic gain and business success. Sometimes, the business model of some Country is building military goods and export to make more money from the war torn nations. Therefore, the some of the leaders have to find some reasons to spark the war against some nation for silly reasons to run their business model. Otherwise, their military goods are not sold and incur heavy loss to the company profitability. Such companies are happy with huge gain but many innocent lives are lost. Is it really fair and justified  to see some innocent people die for sake of someones business gain by selling tankers and guns? Should our leader change their business model into peaceful products and make this world happy place to live. Do they really have compassionate heart? Do they really care for peaceful neighborhood is the only way to achieve best negotiation for win-win situation rather than battling with force and ammunition.  Most of the resources are wasted due to war.

The war is fought for expanding their territories and airspace as powerful nations.  All nations want to look powerful and have more influence on other countries with their military might and economic power. No nations wants to stay happy with what we have and what the mother earth already provided enough for survival. The economic wants are bloating aggressively and people are going mad due to our policies of economic growth fueled with desire and craving. We have no contentment at heart but wants to amass more financial gain in the stock market. Indeed every nation have enough natural resources if utilized judiciously and economically. We really don't need to expand our wing towards another territories in the hunt of resources with help of war and force. Should our world leaders shift their paradigm towards more peaceful solution by forgetting the concept of wars. The concept of war is human created; therefore it is preventable and solvable if we can shift our paradigm towards peaceful coexistence with neighborhood. Killing our enemy is not the final solution but begging of the problem. The cause and effect of killing is to repay the debt in next life in the same way. This is vicious circle of cause and effect or karma in Buddhist terminology. Today, we will kill them but tomorrow they will kill us since there is no end of life until and unless we are fully enlightened.

I would like to dedicate my lay man's prayer and wishes to those who lost their lives at Gaza,  Ukraine and Afghanistan due to current ongoing wars for sake of human desire to control and suppressed the enemies with bombardment and shelling day and night. May their soul reach the heavens of ten directions of Buddha and end their sufferings of hellish realms. May also the world leaders too change their strategy of war into peaceful coexistence with our immediate neighborhood and make this world a safe and better place to live on. May all sentient being enjoy the peace and happiness not the war and famines and live long life.

Mindu Wangdi

The Century Park Life

The Bangkok is ranked as 8th mega city in the world and it is true indeed. The people are working twenty hours to earn more money.  I as the student of Mahidol College of Management is also one of the Bankok's  citizens for short duration. My gratitude goes to Thailand International Cooperation Agency for supporting my studies in foreign land with just to survive daily. After long hours of class and studies, the best place for me to take rest is the Century Park where I have to walk around twenty minutes from my ghostly haunted V.M mansion. 

As soon as I reach the Park; the music of Chinese dance played by the exercise lovers will welcome me with fresh air blowing from the west that kisses my body softly making me feel quite bizarre and poetic. Sitting on the chair and watching many activities of different people going on is memorable. Someone with head phone on their heads for music with short pants running round the track makes me feel quite funny. Do we really need music on while we run? That is another mystery I could not get answer from them. I have no right to interview the strangers but just have some hypotheses on their behaviors. 

In the corner of flower garden, I see many youths taking photo with their lavish IPhone in different postures. Some girls try to show off their beauty in front of public and distract my attention as silent observer of the park. They never know what I am doing, indeed, I am observing their personalities and behaviors as silent watcher in the park. It is really good to be silent observer, we can learn many characters of different people in the park. Sometimes I feel that I am window shopper who can understand all consumer behaviors in the park if I want to open any business here in Bangkok. Watching human beings act is rejoicing and fruitful ways of gaining ideas of current mood.

In some corners, I can see new girl friends and boy friends came for evening date near small artificial fountain and murmuring their love story and happiness. I was wandering if I could know what they are sharing and planing for the night? This is another mystery which I cannot solve with my ordinary mind. I need to hire the omniscient power of Lord Buddha to read other's mind  fully. Can scientific development help to read others mind stream at that present moment in the park. The modern Scientists are confused while dealing with human minds and subtle change under going. Did scientists really understood their mind? The nuclear bomb and war heads are products of scientists but they are still confused themselves as godly figure. 

The kids are having joyous life at children's park hanging around. It is the place where everyone gets happiness and joy after long hours of work in the day. May their happiness and peace be sustained forever. But sadly, life is uncertain and death is certain. Will I see them tomorrow as happy as today? This is how human life runs on this earth. Since the death day is unknown and unpredictable by any of us. Today we are in this park happily doing some activities. Tomorrow, we may not be meeting in this park. Therefore, I wish you all visitors of park a happy and pleasant life. May we all meet in Zangdopelri in front of Guru Rinpcohe and Khandro Yeshi Tshogyel.  May you all live long life. This is the prayer of silent man of Park.

Mindu Wangdi

Life and Sickness!

Recollecting the day I start my life in Bangkok to study master degree at Mahidol University is all pain and suffering that I undergo in the foreign land where I have one to rely and trust. My mind still digs out the ugly question of whether it was my past "fate" or "Karma" that send to Bangkok, the land of Smile. Foreigner like me really did not have any peace and happiness in the land of smile and joy but full of sickness and pain throughout my study period. No sooner did I arrived here, I was invited by big fall in the toilet at midnight and my suffering continues till date with poor digestive system sickness. The hospital namely Ramthibodi is another home where I frequently visit with my different sicknesses and symptoms. Who will understand my deep suffering on this earth in the foreign land to earn master degree to make my family happy and prosperous. Deeply hurt and crying at heart but no one notices my tears rolling down the checks. Who bothers in this 21st century whether your neighbor is alive or dead? All care their own boundaries only. All are so selfish and individualistic way of life.  Will my wife and kids? Will my Bhutan Narcotics Control Agency Office mates? Will the Royal Civil Service Commission?  Will my family members? Will Buddhas of ten directions? will College of Management Mahidol University faculty & Professors? 

Having to visit hospital time and time makes my heart bleed and shy face. It is difficult to consult doctors with frequent visit at Ramathibodi as foreigner. Nothing is offered free in Thailand. Every step has its financial burden and implications as student where the insurance coverage is limited. Surviving with just seven thousand baht per month along with my  medical bills is becoming nightmare whereby I have to knock the door of my scholarship office. With the help of my protecting deities and Buddhas of ten directions, I received good support from my scholarship office to refund for my excessive bills. The insurance coverage is very low for me and lengthy process to get refund of few thousands which drives me to crazy situation. This is how I am suffering in the land of Smile due to my ill-luck and low merits collected in my past life.

Lord Buddha said" All individual sufferings come from our bad deeds in the past lives". This theory proved right in case of me.  When we suffer as an individual, no one will notice his/her pain and emotional status. Sometimes, people make fun of ones sickness and add more salt to the sore instead of consoling. Nevertheless, in life, one thing I learned as patient is to live with diseases and evil forces and fight back with resilience mind set and being supported by my protecting  and tutelary deities behind my life. I alone cannot succeed in life indeed. I am very much grateful to my root masters and deities of ten directions for making me very strong at heart even though I was weak in physical set up.

The giant Lord Buddha of Ding Dang road temple which I frequently visit for seeking help in times of hard was the source of inspiration and courage to fight the war with devils, demons and ghosts of Thailand that visits my room and disturb my sleep for more than one year. The devils can manifest in different forms and steal away my life force and send many diseases to kill me right away. At this scientific age, people may believe when I say ghost and devils lurking on to kills us. I did experience here in Bangkok city not in the mountains and just sharing my real life case so that other practitioners can be alert with their Tutelary deity recitations.  The practitioners are never left in peace by these devils and demons who tries to disturb our attention on meditations and mantra recitations. Most of the practitioners get killed along the path if we are not vigilant with this evil forces.

Finally, wishing high to help all sentient beings who suffer in this six realms of hell constantly with birth, aging, sickness and death. This chain of suffering is like "vicious circle of poverty" as said in economics. This vicious circle can't be broken down until and unless we gain enlightenment like Lord Buddha did in 2500 years ago. There is no gate for all sentient beings to escape away from pain in hellish realm but only through deep and constant practice of meditations being guided by great master can cut off this vicious circle and reach the ultimate happiness. May all sentient being enjoy peace and happiness during their short stay in this world. May the wars, famines, and sickness be reduced and may peace prevail on this earth always. May all sentient beings enjoy the best fruit of economic growth.

Mindu Wangdi

Heartbreaking Journey After Death.

Life is uncertain but the death is certain and sure to knock our door one day to every sentient beings in different ways like chronic  sickness, accidents, starvation and wars.We have birthday celebrations but no death day celebration. Every one does feel pain and loss at heart to see our dearest ones dying and leaves us suddenly from our hands. That is the truth. Nothing is permanent on this earth, even the mother earth, oceans, mountains, air and fire have to get extinct from this world one day leaving no traces behind, which we all human beings clings at too much and suffer greatly.  We all wanted to live forever without the Death visiting our homes to snatch our life forces. This dream is not really going to be true. Be prepared for the worst event in life. 

I hear many people die from air plane crash, ferry sinking, natural disaster, wars, car accidents and die from cancers and we all wish them "Rest In Peace" as a sign of love and farewell to them. What if, the dead souls does encounter with these fearful and wrathful forms of masks dances on their lone journey towards another rebirth depending upon ones good deeds on earth. Such wrathful mask dances are shown during festivals in Bhutan to know them well and be familiar with to reduce the torture and fear from such dances arriving towards Death souls holding dangerous weapons to destroy and punish for the sinful life we lived on earth. There is only one good friend after death is "The White God" Lha Karpo who will save us from hellish torture by defending to the "Lord of Death". Shinjay Choegi Gyelp. The retinue of "Black Devil" or Dre Nagchung will drag the dead souls with his black ropes tied on their neck for the final judgement of one's good and bad deeds on this earth. If we lived very sinful life, the judgement is sure for hellish rebirth until we pay the debt of our sins. And if we lived very virtuous life; the judgement is for the Heavenly rebirth with support of "White God". Therefore, everything is in our hand while we chose the black or white path after death. Regretting after death is of no use since the harm is already done and result will show up for our deeds. 

What if the dead souls goes everyday hungry and thirsty journey alone. Nothing to carry with them after death as we do on this world. There is no ATM and VISA card facilities in intermediate state of life. There is no TESCO outlet services to pick some food items but all dangerous figures of black devils hooping to kill and crush it many times. The hard earned money, cars, building and family is of no use after death. Our body is already buried and burned down but our mind is still wandering,  longing for the food and water to satiate it in Bardo "Intermediate state". Can they really "Rest in Peace" if it is the case, life after death. I feel pity for the dead souls going through such tormenting life alone. No one is going to come and support but we need to face ourselves for 49 days maximum. 

What if the dead souls can see their relatives eating, chatting and wanted to talk and share their feelings of pain. The human naked eyes cannot see our dead souls even though dead ones can see us clearly. How much pain and suffering that dead souls will feel when we don't reply their talk and see it. Do we really think the dead souls will enjoy or "Rest In Peace" after death. There is no traces of warm clothes and heating agents in the intermediate state but freezing cold. If it is the case, what we can do for them to reduce their turbulence encounter for 49 days in the search of another rebirth depending on their good deeds.

The Buddha Dharma have solutions to help them with our death rituals and recitation of mantras which can help to gather huge merits by the dead souls and get swift rebirth from that tortuous life they undergo. Guru Rinpoche, the second Buddha left many texts and teachings for supporting the death souls by the realized Masters and monks in different ways.

Therefore, can we really wish our dead souls with wording "RIP" "Rest In Peace" or should we shift our paradigm and help the death ones with practical rituals spending some money rather than depositing in Banks with options available in the Tantric Buddhism if we really love our dead souls. Wishing them "Rest In Peace" really does not provide any help for the situation is different and very tough life alone encountering the fearful forms of dances. The merit that I get from writing this article is dedicated  to all dead souls to reduce the fearful encounters and tortures from Black devils and get swift good rebirth to continue and practice Buddha Dharma on this earth.

Mindu Wangdi