Life and Sickness!

Recollecting the day I start my life in Bangkok to study master degree at Mahidol University is all pain and suffering that I undergo in the foreign land where I have one to rely and trust. My mind still digs out the ugly question of whether it was my past "fate" or "Karma" that send to Bangkok, the land of Smile. Foreigner like me really did not have any peace and happiness in the land of smile and joy but full of sickness and pain throughout my study period. No sooner did I arrived here, I was invited by big fall in the toilet at midnight and my suffering continues till date with poor digestive system sickness. The hospital namely Ramthibodi is another home where I frequently visit with my different sicknesses and symptoms. Who will understand my deep suffering on this earth in the foreign land to earn master degree to make my family happy and prosperous. Deeply hurt and crying at heart but no one notices my tears rolling down the checks. Who bothers in this 21st century whether your neighbor is alive or dead? All care their own boundaries only. All are so selfish and individualistic way of life.  Will my wife and kids? Will my Bhutan Narcotics Control Agency Office mates? Will the Royal Civil Service Commission?  Will my family members? Will Buddhas of ten directions? will College of Management Mahidol University faculty & Professors? 

Having to visit hospital time and time makes my heart bleed and shy face. It is difficult to consult doctors with frequent visit at Ramathibodi as foreigner. Nothing is offered free in Thailand. Every step has its financial burden and implications as student where the insurance coverage is limited. Surviving with just seven thousand baht per month along with my  medical bills is becoming nightmare whereby I have to knock the door of my scholarship office. With the help of my protecting deities and Buddhas of ten directions, I received good support from my scholarship office to refund for my excessive bills. The insurance coverage is very low for me and lengthy process to get refund of few thousands which drives me to crazy situation. This is how I am suffering in the land of Smile due to my ill-luck and low merits collected in my past life.

Lord Buddha said" All individual sufferings come from our bad deeds in the past lives". This theory proved right in case of me.  When we suffer as an individual, no one will notice his/her pain and emotional status. Sometimes, people make fun of ones sickness and add more salt to the sore instead of consoling. Nevertheless, in life, one thing I learned as patient is to live with diseases and evil forces and fight back with resilience mind set and being supported by my protecting  and tutelary deities behind my life. I alone cannot succeed in life indeed. I am very much grateful to my root masters and deities of ten directions for making me very strong at heart even though I was weak in physical set up.

The giant Lord Buddha of Ding Dang road temple which I frequently visit for seeking help in times of hard was the source of inspiration and courage to fight the war with devils, demons and ghosts of Thailand that visits my room and disturb my sleep for more than one year. The devils can manifest in different forms and steal away my life force and send many diseases to kill me right away. At this scientific age, people may believe when I say ghost and devils lurking on to kills us. I did experience here in Bangkok city not in the mountains and just sharing my real life case so that other practitioners can be alert with their Tutelary deity recitations.  The practitioners are never left in peace by these devils and demons who tries to disturb our attention on meditations and mantra recitations. Most of the practitioners get killed along the path if we are not vigilant with this evil forces.

Finally, wishing high to help all sentient beings who suffer in this six realms of hell constantly with birth, aging, sickness and death. This chain of suffering is like "vicious circle of poverty" as said in economics. This vicious circle can't be broken down until and unless we gain enlightenment like Lord Buddha did in 2500 years ago. There is no gate for all sentient beings to escape away from pain in hellish realm but only through deep and constant practice of meditations being guided by great master can cut off this vicious circle and reach the ultimate happiness. May all sentient being enjoy peace and happiness during their short stay in this world. May the wars, famines, and sickness be reduced and may peace prevail on this earth always. May all sentient beings enjoy the best fruit of economic growth.

Mindu Wangdi